I like being married. Its weird and funny. Much harder than I thought, better than I thought, but the definition of ‘better’ might be different than I would have thought when single…

On Sunday in church Rachel sighed… it sounded like a “I’m mildly tired, not unhappy… just not feeling like going running” kind of a sigh (probably should have hyphenated that). I almost said to her, in sheer reaction, “You’re right, we should go to Chipotle after church”. I didn’t. No more than 2 minutes later she whispered to me, “I was thinking Chipotle?” It was funny to me.

A few weeks ago we had a conversation that I wanted her to blog about, and she politely declined. I found the conversation funny so I will attempt to recreate it here.

Piece of information you need to know to understand: my hair is pretty thick, and short enough that most days I don’t do anything to it. Literally: anything.

Rachel: So, is it weird that you never have to brush your hair?

Matt: …

Rachel: It doesn’t really occur to you does it? That most people brush their hair, and/or have to do things to it before they leave the house.

Matt: Not really.

Rachel: You used to brush it right?

Matt: Yeah, I think so. (In My head: that would be high school? Junior High?)

Rachel: But, you used to… so you have hair brushes right?

Matt: … (gazing at her, not really smiling, but letting her piece it together)

Rachel: So, you did have them right?

Matt: right.

Rachel: Well, where are they now? The brushes?

Matt: … (wait for it)

Rachel: You have no idea where they are, right? Even though there was a time in your life where you employed them?

Matt: Right. (In my head I am thinking that the last time I brushed my hair would have been at 29th and peoria in Tulsa. Last time I lived there would have been high school… no telling where any brushes are I guess…)

What I find interesting about marriage is that I can communicate so much with my wife, and yet she will never really understand what it takes for me (because the answer is: ‘nothing it just happens’) to have no idea where my hair brushes are. Because she doesn’t lose things (although, when she does it stresses her out a lot more than it does me… because I lose things all the time). So – she understands so much without me having to say it, and yet my ability (let’s just keep calling it an ability okay?) to lose things is still somewhat amazing to her.

I find that interesting. And funny.

3 responses to “brush

  1. Having lived with your wife for four years in the days before she was your wife, I very much enjoyed this blog post. I can hear her voice when I read it. I miss her.I agree with you about marriage. It's wonderful and strange all at the same time. At least you chose well when you decided to jump in!

  2. Having lived with you for many years at 29th and Peoria, it doesn't surprise me at all that you lose things. Things were never important to you. And, by the way, you left a lot more than brushes behind when you moved.You are still the earnest, compassionate, and very forgetful person you always were.Mom

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